2022 was a year to remember in so many ways. I turned 30. Tom & I got married. My best friend had a baby. And life finally started to feel normal post-covid. However, when I sat down to write this post, I was harshly reminded that while it was definitely a monumental year, it was also one that challenged and tested me in so many ways.
I noticed earlier this week, everyone was touting their 2022 wins and using those to set their 2023 goals, which I’m ALL for. I make personal & career goals every year that I religiously check in on quarterly and don’t get me started on my annual vision boarding exercise. All that being said, I think sharing my highs along with my lows is a more realistic way of evaluating the year and starting the new one from a more grounded place. So, here we go!
The Highs
1| Wedding Year. This year was beyond special given all of the memorable moments and celebrations sprinkled throughout leading up to our December wedding. From picking out my wedding dress, asking my bridesmaids & groomsmen, the magical shower my mom threw me, the fabulous bachelorette my sister threw me to smaller moments like venue walkthroughs and floral samples, each moment was one that I cherished with my closest friends and family. The lead up to the wedding is just as fun as the wedding itself and after being with Tom for 10 years, I promised myself that I’d be as present as possible in these moments. I knew I owed it to myself to truly indulge and enjoy each one.
2| Back To The Blog. In 2021, I took a little blog hiatus, and honestly, it felt like I lost a piece of myself. I’ve been writing this blog for almost 10 years and prioritizing work and wedding planning over it was a necessary evil but also one that truly crushed me. In 2022, I got back in the groove. Definitely not as much as I would have liked but it was enough to feel inspired and re-invested in this special place.
3| Friendship. After two years of being stuck at home and a decade of prioritizing work over everything else, I really enjoyed spending more time with friends, deepening old friendships, and fostering new ones. This year, I showed up to my dinner dates on time, planned weekends away, and tried to keep in touch as best as possible. I admit that I’m not the best texter or caller but this year, I found joy in getting just a little bit better.
The Lows
1| Leaving A Dream Job. Over the Summer, I left my job as Director of Digital Marketing at Showtime. This was a very hard decision and one that paralyzed me for a few months until I ripped the band aid off. Working for a TV network in this particular role was a goal of mine for so long that it was hard to admit that I wanted other things for my career. While this was a personal low for me given the emotional rollercoaster I was on, I really LOVE my Showtime team and am so proud of what they accomplished (and continue to!). A micro-high is leaving them on good terms and maintaining those relationships as friendships, mentorships and more.
2| Wedding Planning. While the lead-up to the wedding was SO much fun with each celebration more special than the last, the process is ROUGH if you are an indecisive, overly emotional Bride like me. I had the best planner and vendors in the business but it’s difficult to make so many decisions that feel MAJOR all at once. I always joke that when it comes to work, I’m the most organized and nuanced planner but in my personal life, I’m a bit more messy and let others take the lead on planning, and I think the wedding proved this theory perfectly. The only problem, is that I was the Bride and couldn’t let others take the lead on everything. All in all, it was a great experience and everything worked out but there were definitely some stressful moments along the way.
3|Mental Health Challenges. All of the above (including the highs) led to some really heavy days in 2022. I was at an all-time low all because my expectations for 2022 was that I should have been at an all-time high all year long. In early May, Tom brought me away to Mohonk Mountain House for a little retreat after he noticed some alarming behaviors and it was revitalizing in a lot of ways. Throughout that weekend, I noticed two behaviors that pulled me out of my funk. The first, I physically could not ask for help. On our first day, I was on my own while Tom worked and I literally searched for the spa for over an hour without asking anyone who worked for the hotel where it was. While this was small, I realized in reflected a much bigger problem that I was dealing with. If I can’t ask for directions, I definitely wasn’t asking for help at work, with wedding planning and so much more. The second, I was wildly motivated and energized by my own personal achievement. During the trip, I took on the hardest hiking trail on the Mountain just because ‘I needed a win.’ I am NOT a hiker and the trail was super dangerous in reality. After I did it, I realized that I needed to get more comfortable with the status quo and that ‘status quo’ didn’t mean I was a failure or slacker. These two realizations inspired me to make some changes in my life and while I still have tough days, I’m definitely on the up and up.
It was a year of love, fun, and stress but most importantly, change. Kicking off 2023, I’m getting more comfortable with the idea of change and embracing it more wholeheardly.
So glad you’re getting back into it! Kudos to you for being able to reflect and identify your challenges, and for sharing them with us. It was super helpful to read!