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In the past year I have learned more than ever what friendship means. It is psychologically proven that women look for that one-true “soulmate” to call their best friend. If you look at your best friend or your group of friends you will agree that this is undoubtedly true. Girls are constantly posting on social media, “love my best friend in the world,” “BFFS Forever,” etcetera. I too am guilty of this. However, when asked what is friendship many of us can hardly come up with a few words to say about it.

The definition of friendship is a personal one. The definition comes in moments rather than words. What does this mean exactly? We all have those moments of truth where we say to ourselves, “this friendship will never be the same.” This happens in both positive and negative ways. Whether it be the friend who stayed up all night with you the day your heart was broken or the friend that let your birthday pass without saying a word, both of these incidents help you define friendship.

When friendships go wrong I personally get very worked up about it because for me friendship is something I work at everyday. When you invest so much time in a friendship its hard not to let little things bother you. However, in the past year I have learned that when friendship gets you down it gives you an opportunity to look at the big picture. This is one person, think of all the other friends you have. Perhaps this is a realization that your friendship isn’t what you thought it was and life is giving you the chance to find that new soulmate and work on other friendships. Stop trying to find that perfect soulmate, there are so many wonderful people in each of our lives why should we just pick one?

This year has been full of realizations that has helped me define friendship.

Friendship is:

1. Is excited for your success just as much as you are, if not more.

2. Texting me in the middle of the night because they know something is wrong.

3. Making me do the right thing even if it isn’t what I want to do.

4. Loving my boyfriend as much as I do.

5. Wishing me a happy 21st birthday at midnight, from Paris.

6. Forgiveness.

7. Hating everyone I hate even if they don’t know why.

8. Changing their plans to be there for you.

9. Just wanting to spend time with you, even if its just watching TV.

10.   Will listen to every detail of your pointless stories.